I assume you mean that the world has lost its mind over season two of restaurant dramedy The Bear?
I saw the first season and didn’t get what the fuss was about.
What? You don’t fancy Carmy (AKA actor Jeremy Allen White)?
I guess he’s quite well put together if that’s your thing.
Those biceps! Those tight T-shirts! The tousled hair! He’s pretty much male perfection.
Keep Carmy and Carry On: Jeremy Allen White pictured in the Bear, which as just come out with season two
The guy’s making sandwiches.
You’re missing the romance.
Clearly, I am.
As the New York Times put it when The Bear first launched, it’s ‘a war story that happens to take place in a kitchen’.
I’m still missing the jeopardy here.
This season is all about Carmy turning the humble (yet brilliant) sandwich joint into a fine-dining destination.
So, he’s got some scallops in. It hardly makes him Alexander the Great.
You’re in the minority on this one, you know.
Maybe you’re right but I find Jeremy Allen White annoying. He needs to stop looking anguished – and wash his hair.
There’s always Poulter.
I’m not fussed about chicken.
Will Poulter, the British actor who is chef Luca in the current season.
And what’s Luca’s schtick?
In one heartfelt scene, he opens up to co-worker Marcus about embracing vulnerability. Of striving without the guarantee of success. Of realising that failure is part of the creative process.
What’s he making?
While wearing a tight T-shirt accessorised with tattoos and tousled hair, by any chance?
Real chefs don’t look like that!
Some of them do.
He’s a retired footballer.
So is Gordon Ramsay.
Never mind. Go on then, what has David Beckham been cooking?
Wearing a T-shirt that showed off his ink and sculpted biceps?
Isn’t that look… well, a bit of a cliché?
No, it’s hot and (according to a video posted on Instagram by wife Victoria last month), he constructed a very respectable salsa.
That’s not cooking, it’s chopping up tomatoes.
He’d made rice, too.
In that case, I’m sure the Michelin stars are in the post.
What would you rather watch?
I’m always impressed by James Martin’s yorkshires. They rise beautifully without him feeling the need to wear any kind of bodycon.
That would be distressing.
So can we agree chefs don’t need to wear tight T-shirts?
Absolutely. In Emily in Paris, her love interest Gabriel is a chef, and he wears pressed whites. Also, Carmy wears a sweater in season two of The Bear.
I know you’re finding this distinction hard but Carmy and Gabriel are fictional.
OK, but there are definitely hot real-life chefs out there, too.
Louis Vuitton model Rōze Traore has wowed New York as both a fashion icon and a chef and, before you ask, he favours a designer polo over a tight T-shirt.
We’re discussing what the man wears, though!
Isn’t the t-shirt, ink and sculpted biceps look a bit of a cliche?
Well, so is GQ, and they know what’s hot if anyone does.
A new breed of social-media chef.
What’s he cooking?
Remains unclear but he’s wearing ‘an Aimé Leon Dore short-sleeve button down, maybe with a Hanes vest’.
I still don’t care what sort of tops chefs wear!
OK, in that case you’d probably get on better with Swiss pastry chef Cedrik Lorenzen, who has four million followers on TikTok.
Why? What does he wear over his torso?